Well, hello there!
It’s been awhile since I’ve seen you!
So, how ya doin’?
Good. Good. Glad to hear it.
Well, I’m glad you asked!
I’ve been wandering aimlessly, thanks. Yep. For awhile now.
No. No. It’s fine.
No, I mean it. REALLY.
Because wandering aimlessly I’ve learned some things. And that’s always nice.
And, of course, once I learn something I always like to share. Sharing something I’ve learned always makes me feel like I’ve discovered something that no one else knows, even though half the time what I’ve “discovered” gets a yawn and a blank stare from the one I’m telling.
Unless what I discovered is a dead vole or a live rabbit. That’s worth sharing, I’m told.
Which is when I realized maybe my dog wasn’t who I was supposed to tell.
Maybe it’s you.
(And if it’s not, feel free to yawn and stare blankly. I’m used to it).
Anyhoo, like I was saying. I learned something from wandering aimlessly. A few somethings actually, and here they are:
1. Wandering aimlessly is not a pointless activity. At first it may feel like you’re lost, but the truth is you aren’t really lost if Someone knows where you are. Otherwise why would GPS’s be so popular, right?
2. When you are wandering aimlessly, you are constantly looking for something to tell you or show you that THIS is where you are supposed to be. The trick is that you don’t know what the Thing is that will tell or show you. So you start to look at EVERY Thing more carefully. You take time to examine. You reflect. You ponder. You know… all the things that are good for you and at the same time feel incredibly unAmerican because we are born to Go! Do! Achieve! Succeed! And instead most of the time we end up just running around like chickens with our heads cut off. Which is, in my observation (and from much personal experience) very American, but not necessarily healthy.
3. It takes a certain amount of trust to be able to find what you’re looking for. And this isn’t just trust in the Thing you’re seeking. It’s also trust in Yourself to *know* it when you see it. Which can be terrifying at first. But the more you wander, the more you start to find that trust. And the more open you become to finding that Thing, the more you realize that you’re no longer just seeking out that ONE THING that will point you where you need to go, but that you have many options. And you suddenly have the inner fortitude to calm down enough to see that there not only one, but several of them are good and viable options.
4. Realizing there are many directions you could go can be both freeing, and frightening at the same time. On the one hand, knowing that there are several directions you can go can be a very freeing feeling, because in general we like options, as opposed to being painted into a corner. On the other hand, having choices can be a bit daunting when you’re already weary from your aimless wanderings and you Just. Want. To. Know!
5. But once you see the options, choosing can be easier than you think. Especially if you don’t overthink it. In the past I’ve been known to suffer at the very thought of having SO MANY CHOICES that pretty soon I can see myself succeeding at every choice. And failing at every choice. And wondering what God wants. (And wishing He would just TELL ME ALREADY!) And so I wonder what my husband thinks I should do. And I ask anyone that will listen what they think, and they all either don’t care, or care too much, or tell me things I don’t want to hear, or one thinks I should do this and the other thinks I should do that. And some look like they think I should do this, but they tell me I should do that, so that after awhile even the dog begins to look like he’s got it all figured out but isn’t telling. And the whole thing Just. Drives. Me. NUTS!!
6. After awhile, you are finally able to stop wandering, and instead observe yourself and your wanderings. And that’s when you see a pattern emerge. And that’s when you know you’ve found something. For me, you may notice that my most recent wandering has brought me here. To this new blog website. Where the blog name and the address match. And where you can subscribe to my posts via email. And where you can follow me as The Mystic Mom by choosing like on the right-hand side over there on Facebook and (in the very near fuure) on Twitter.
And I will confess that it is absolutely frightening.
But even if I’m not confident in where it’s going, or what it means. I am confident in the fact that it’s where I’m supposed to be for now.
And the rest will sort itself out. Eventually.
To be honest, I don’t care.
For now, I’m just content and amazed that my aimless (and seemingly pointless until now) wandering has brought me to a new place.
A different place.
A place I’ve never been before.
But at the same time feels exactly like home.